Games Journal

July 2018

July 2018

We’re house.

Written Saturday, July 28th @ four:45pm

Strolling out of the church, 28 years in the past..prepared for all times.

At this time we walked out of the doorways on the Mayo Clinic Hospital, Saint Mary’s Campus. 28 years in the past we have been strolling out of the church doorways after saying, I do. Each pictures we’re completely satisfied, one among them we’re wanting our greatest and prepared for our new journey, the opposite photograph…we’re exhausted. Trusting God, trusting this path. Glad “Golden” Anniversary Rod. 28 years on the 28th of July. And what a wonderful present to deliver our daughter residence.

Leaving St. Mary’s Hospital with our daughter, exhausted.

#happyanniversary #goldenanniversary #28years #lifeisajourney @ Mayo Clinic Hospital, Saint Marys Campus


She is staying one other additional night time…

Written Friday, July 27th @ 1:30pm

Wanting up at her room.

Crystal seems to be so peaceable proper now as I sit subsequent her. I tucked her in, tickled her arms till she fell asleep and now I’m enjoying catch as much as all of your messages. Crystal shall be staying one other additional night time on the hospital as we attempt to get her ache beneath management.
At present, Crystal did rise up and stroll… She stared out the window. She doesn’t say a lot, it hurts to speak, to eat, to smile. She has made remarks that she by no means needs to do that once more.
Rod has gone residence to work for a day and can come again tonight. Cassidy got here up yesterday able to do something for her sister, Courtney stunned us this morning with assist from Cassidy. My mother, Shari has not left and Gage has been an outstanding husband💜


Surgical procedure is over.

Written Wednesday, July 25th at 5:20pm

We received nice information. God is sweet.

As we stroll into Crystals hospital room after surgical procedure, she lays there so nonetheless. It appears like she is barely respiration. It’s truly troublesome as mom to observe her lay there like that. I might really feel my tears.  You possibly can see the ache in her face even together with her eyes closed. Little smirks once we ask a query. Even slightly nod.  However actually after a surgical procedure, you need it quiet. You don’t need to speak, you need to relaxation. We hung her poster for her docs and nurses to signal and went to the ready room.

I had to return to the room actual fast, to see the docs identify on the board. As I quietly stroll into the room. I see her eyes open. She says mother I want water. She seems to be unhappy, she seems like she is gonna cry however she takes her drink. I ask her if she wants me to remain, she says no, are you able to shut the door. I slip out of the room with a couple of tears.

We meet with the drugs physician on the ground this night. There’s a concern together with her kidneys with the dye nonetheless in it, they may work all night time to flush it out to ensure there isn’t any drawback with the kidneys. So please pray for that. Please pray for her ache to go away.

However now for the opposite aspect, the second Physician Schmit and his nurse come to speak with us after her lengthy surgical procedure. I can see on the different finish of the ready room he’s strolling in the direction of us, I feel he’s smiling. Dr. Schmit begins to tells us he has achieved many ablations in his life however this one was probably the most troublesome one he has carried out in a yr.  He apologized for a way lengthy it took. The primary tumor was straightforward however the others have been troublesome. After extra time with a physician that didn’t surrender , he obtained them. He obtained all of them!!!  And the one that’s questionable, he has disregarded. We have been all shocked, pleased and listening to every part so intently. Crystal has her workforce because the docs have theirs.

She goes to be in ache for awhile. It will be an extended street. However with prayers, constructive individuals surrounding her & objectives forward of her, she shall be simply high-quality. We’ve obtained this! 

God is sweet. Thanks all on your help. Now I want just a bit time to myself….

She is in Surgical procedure…

Written Wednesday, July 25th @ 9:00am

We took this photograph on the lodge proper earlier than we walked to the hospital.

We sit in a big ready room, there is just one different household in right here.  I’m a bit of chilled, thank goodness I introduced a cardigan.  I really feel exhausted, my eyes are heavy and I’m considering I have to get a espresso.  Rod is enjoying video games on his telephone, Gage is choosing out new telephone case for Crystal, my mother is writing thanks’s from her considerate presents she acquired and I’m considering I have to perform a little replace earlier than that espresso.

We needed to be at St. Mary’s this morning at 5:30am.  I can inform you Crystal has had a very good morning.  Sure, she is nervous however the identical sort of nervous earlier than a surgical procedure.  We’re additionally the identical type of nervous too.  Crystal has smiled and laughed, we truly all laughed this morning for about 45 minutes.  So I assume we will say it’s been a superb morning.

Yesterday was lengthy.  Very Very lengthy.  We left our lodge at 5:45am. Checks started at 6:15am. Crystal completed her MRI, blood work, the New Nuclear Drugs Pet MRI Scan…which scared her to demise.  She doesn’t need to do this one once more. She stated she about cried & needed to cease. Crystal needed to lay there as they took this massive fats tube full of nuclear radioactive stuff and injected it into her arm.  It was very uncomfortable, it harm moving into she defined. Then she needed to loosen up and sit at the hours of darkness for about an hour.  Earlier than going into the machine she needed to placed on this big helmet, laid strapped down, with a assist button in her hand.  She couldn’t transfer in any respect, as they slowly moved her into the MRI Machine for 45 minuets after which one other scan for 35 minuets. She stated she did good for concerning the first 20 minutes, then she acquired an itch on her face and realized she actually couldn’t get it.  It was taking her breath making an attempt to wrinkle up her nostril, the tears got here, the fear got here after which she talked to herself, she calmed herself down.

Crystal lastly acquired to eat a bagel round 4pm. Crystal’s Surgical Group assembly was about four:30pm. And our assembly together with her docs at 5:30pm. It was 6:30pm once we lastly received some dinner.

We discovered that the Dodatate Pet Scan labored for her sort of tumors. With that being stated, we have now in fact the 2 tumors from the final MRI that they will see, however we now have discovered two new ones, with one among them being simply as massive as the opposite tumors from the earlier scan. What is horrifying, is that they will’t say if it has grown that enormous in lower than a month or if it simply didn’t present up on that final scan? There’s additionally a questionable lesion that they are going to be taking a look at nearer at present.

Our docs are assured, we’re assured.  However that doesn’t imply that mother, doesn’t cry and fear.

As for the love we’re receiving, it’s fantastic.  It’s lovely.  I’ve acquired a number of messages which have touched my coronary heart.  I’ve requested God do actually deserve all of this help?  I’ve discovered myself wanting round Mayo, feeling responsible that we’ve got so many individuals that care, which are reaching out, which might be taking the time to share their emotions.  I questioned, if others right here which are sick had the identical uplifting individuals of their lives.

As we walked over to the hospital this morning, I made a comment to Gage about when Crystal was first recognized. I used to be telling him that she had a fundraiser, a Dance-A-Thon.  I needed to converse at it, I used to be scared and nervous.  I used to be joyful and unhappy all on the similar time.  It was humbling I advised him and I defined how I used to be telling the gang of individuals the way it might be worse.  That it was horrible, surprising and unhappy what we have been going via nevertheless it could possibly be a lot worse.  Crystal continues to be right here with us, she was not taken abruptly or by a automotive accident or by somebody who had taken her to hurt her.  I knew the place she was, she was with me.  I couldn’t think about not figuring out the place she was.  I couldn’t think about how a dad or mum would really feel not figuring out.  I don’t assume I might deal with that.  So I’ll take this battle over that one.  The loopy factor about that comment was the subsequent day they discovered these three ladies who have been stored captive.  I consider they have been lacking for about 10 years.  So lots of you from that Dance-A-Thon reached out.  They couldn’t consider I had simply spoke one thing about that.  I need to admit it did give me goosebumps.  And now in the present day, we’ve got a woman, a younger lovely woman lacking from Iowa, Mollie Tibbetts.  It breaks my coronary heart for her mother and father, her household, her pals.  I can’t even start to really feel the ache they really feel.  It makes me sick to my abdomen.  So I’ll take the prayers we’re getting for my daughter and I’ll ask God to take heed to them and in case you want some extra for Mollie, I do know our household will share.

An enormous week.

Written on Monday July 23rd @ 7:45am

One thing for the docs to sign up her room.

I sit right here within the peace and quiet.  No youngsters, no music, no tv.  No speaking, no canine wanting my consideration and I’m packed prepared to go away.  I’m considering of the whole lot I need to get off my chest, what I have to say, and it overwhelms me.  I’m wanting on the most lovely yellow roses from my pricey good friend Shannon.  I reread a stupendous card our candy neighbor Michele wrote.  I stare on the paperwork from the “Crystal T-Shirts” and I’m considering, over 200 individuals shall be sporting them Wednesday.  Such a blessing.

I can inform you July has been a busy month.  We celebrated the 4th of July, went to dinner with some pricey associates, went to Uptown Friday Night time, had a birthday celebration for Rod’s dad turning 80.  Then it was time to want Crystal & Gage a cheerful 2 years earlier than they headed off to Maine for his or her trip.  Gave Courtney and Alec hugs earlier than they have been off to Nashville.  My nephew Colby turned 20.  We had parades, we had festivals, tractor pulls, and superior live shows.  After which my lovely mother lastly retired from Coe School.  Sure, we stayed busy.  Very busy.

Loads of you’re asking when her surgical procedure is.  Here’s a little information.  We depart for Mayo Monday, at present.  She may have testing all day Tuesday.  She can be very hungry with having to cease consuming early this night as a result of her checks begin at 6am and I consider she is going to get to eat after 4pm, then assembly together with her surgical workforce and her docs.  Surgical procedure is scheduled for Wednesday.  So in case you are in search of a day to put on purple, zebra or certainly one of Crystal’s Preventing Shirts…Then that’s the day.

A few of you’re seeing some fundraisers on FB.  Sure, they’re legit.  Thanks for asking.

We had a couple of mothers in our studio get collectively and do a Go Fund Me Web page.  I need to admit, it was troublesome to consider all of this once more. It’s humbling, exhausting, and it is extremely arduous to only say Thank You.  It was very exhausting to learn what they wrote as properly.

I even have a great good friend who owns Soiled Shirley’s (88 16th Avenue SW, Cedar Rapids) and is doing a profit for the day.  10% of all proceeds from the day will go to Crystal.  They may all be sporting her shirts, so please cease in and have a drink, don’t overlook to take a pic too.  And this huge day, would be the day of her surgical procedure… Wednesday!  Once more, Thank You.

As for the t-shirts, we bought over 200, that can be taking good care of the lodge bills, fuel, meals for this journey and potential the subsequent one too!  Thank YOU ALL!

As I used to be speaking with a pal, telling them how I felt with all the things happening.  Discussing the fundraising that’s occurring and the way I simply really feel so bizarre with all of it.  I can’t even describe it.  However that pal made it clear to me to embrace it.  To say Thank You and that’s it, as a result of individuals do care and need to assist.  I actually wanted to listen to that, it assist me simply let go and put it in God’s palms.

Now how is mother doing?  It has been very troublesome.  She has been on trip so I feel together with her being gone, made it arduous for me to remain robust.  Additionally, together with her t-shirt gross sales I obtained to go to with lots of people which are her prayer warriors.  So plenty of fantastic vibes, but many tears.  Not together with, she received her information after which we wait earlier than we might do something, that appeared so onerous this time.

Now how is the household holding up?  I feel we do good as a household.  I feel we’re constructive.  We hold busy.

How is Crystal?  Nicely, she seems to be nice.  She is smiling.  She is busy.  I’m not positive if I informed you all however for Easter we had gotten our household tickets to Child Rock.  By no means dreamed it might be the final huge night time out earlier than Crystals huge week.  So Saturday we’re all smiles, having an amazing night time, after which proper earlier than Child Rock comes out… Crystal, standing subsequent to me, says hey mother, I’ve been eager to inform you that since our journey I’ve been sick.  I’ve some ache in my stomach space and I get very nauseas once I eat or drink something.  I really feel it may be the most cancers.  Gage has been wanting me to inform you however I additionally didn’t need to fear you since I used to be gone.  Anyway, I’m glad that I’m going to Mayo this week.  Then she walked over to face subsequent to Gage.  Yep, my coronary heart broke.  I didn’t need to damage anybody else’s night time.  I simply sat there taking it in.  I noticed Rachel who’s on my dance workforce and quietly stated one thing to her so I might get it off my chest after which growth the live performance started and I requested God to get me via the night time.  As for Child Rock, thanks for taking me away for a few hours and a enjoyable journey residence speaking about how nice of an evening it was.

As for yesterday, my mom had somewhat shock at a luncheon we did for Crystal.  I didn’t need to ignore that my mother had retired.  For sure, it was good.  In Crystal’s phrases, I liked watching grandma & Bob.  They have been so shocked and it made them so pleased.  I beloved it.  They deserved it for the whole lot they’ve completed for us.  Properly stated Crystal.  It’s superb what a bunch of playing cards within the mail can do to place a smile on someones face.  Perhaps that’s it, at this time we should always all ship a card within the mail to somebody we’re fascinated by.  After you set that stamp on it, you smile too.

Completely happy 4th of July

Written on Tuesday, July third @ 2:45pm

It positive is scorching outdoors immediately so I feel I’ll sit within the air con a solution a couple of of your questions.

What’s subsequent for the CR Spirits?

Query 1:  Sure, Rod and I had a pleasant get away with my uncle and aunt.  Whereas we have been away, it was troublesome to obtain a textual content from Crystal who was nonetheless not feeling one of the best.  She was heading to the docs to hopefully get a antibiotic.  In fact I continued to examine on her whereas we have been gone.  When she began to really feel higher, I used to be so relieved.  The day earlier than we have been to return residence we chatted on the telephone about how she was feeling, how her sisters have been doing, work and the Freedom Pageant Parade arising.  After that telephone name I acquired a textual content, “Mother, I hope you guys are having a terrific journey!  I didn’t even ask the way it was going.  Sorry.  I simply hate that my most cancers is again. I’m in all probability extra unhappy then sick.”  That may be a arduous textual content to get if you’re away.

Once we have been coming house, Crystal made a comment that there can be solely two Uptown Friday Nights that she may have the ability to do.  One being that Friday night time and she or he want to go.  I stated isn’t actually scorching and humid there, as I get on the aircraft?  She didn’t care about that, she needed to go.  So, off the aircraft and onto Uptown we went.  Gotta take pleasure in these particular occasions.

Query 2:  Sure, Crystal continues to be dancing.  You wouldn’t know that her most cancers is again.  She has been sick so much this yr however identical to all of us might be with a chilly, bronchitis, strolling pneumonia, that’s what is so unhappy about most cancers, typically you’re sick and also you don’t know.  However dance, takes her away from the concerns for a second.  She loves it, identical to her mother.  I feel I’ve said this earlier than, that this dream that I began 25 years in the past, should of been for her and I had no concept.  All alongside I assumed it was simply my journey.  When Crystal is feeling blue these college students make her smile.  Right here is a few little tales.

Story 1:  On the counter, a Tiny Spirit states, I like your zebra (which sits behind the desk).  Crystal explains, nicely that’s my sort of most cancers.  And that 7 yr previous goes, so you bought bit by a zebra and now you have got zebra most cancers?  Crystal stated to me, Mother, I feel that mom was horrified nevertheless it truly made my night time.

Story 2:  In school a Tiny Spirit says, my mother & I received right into a struggle.  I’m not speaking to her proper now.  Crystal says, nicely I get into arguments with my mother too.  That little woman seems at Crystal and states, nicely you and your mother reside on this huge condo so you will get away from one another (Massive house, which means the dance studio in Lindale Mall, considering we stay there?).  hehehe

Somewhat time with dad at Uptown Friday Night time.

Query three:  Unsure but the place the Studio might be subsequent yr.  Since I’m celebrating 25 years of the CR Spirits Skilled Dance Workforce & Studio I’ve been considering of adjusting it up.  The aim was to let Crystal run with it, however she has no want if I’m not concerned.  We got here up with an concept earlier than her massive appointment and now that has modified every thing.  So right now I wait, I search for indicators and I ask God for steerage.  I really like this job.  I’ve been lucky sufficient to have been given this present to bop, choreograph, journey, meet others, construct ladies up, encompass myself, my household, my studio with fantastic alternatives and in the long run prayer warriors.  It’s nerve racking to vary a path that you simply solely know.  It’s scary as you grow old to attempt one thing new.  It’s much more heartbreaking, to make a change when your daughter who fights for her life doesn’t need it to go anyplace as a result of she believes strongly, it has helped her battle this battle.  So once more, I’ll anticipate a path to point out up…

Query four:  The t-shirts we bought shall be going in the direction of the lodge keep, meals, fuel no matter little issues come up.  These final two years have been a miracle.  Crystal, Gage, Rod and I attempt to cut up the journey prices up as households.  Crystal has been lucky that the most cancers has stayed away and her $7000 each appointment prices have been coated by insurance coverage.

Nevertheless, this one shall be totally different.  Not solely is there a surgical procedure concerned, however a lot of testing, together with this new scan that prices round $20,000.  Insurance coverage struggles with masking it as a result of it’s a new sort of scan, I consider.  Sure, sure, the docs will request it and we’ll struggle it however it’s nonetheless a fear.  When Crystal had discovered of this, the guilt set in.  Gage works exhausting, she can be needing a lot cash.  She turns to me and says, “Mother that’s an excessive amount of cash.  Like I’m going to should see if insurance coverage goes to cowl this.”  It broke my coronary heart.  I instantly stated your dad and I’ll deal with it, we’ll determine it out, you’ll do this scan if they need you too.  You realize, that’s one factor that was good about her being youthful and never married.  We didn’t give her a selection, she didn’t have to fret.  She simply needed to struggle.  Anyway, Crystal made many lengthy telephone calls, she has discovered that if it doesn’t cowl she can be answerable for no less than $9200 for that scan and naturally no matter else may come up.

With that being stated, we might be promoting t-shirts once more.  They’re $20 every, we want to place the order by Thursday, July 12th so they might be again in time for her massive week.

Query 5:  I take pleasure in staying busy.  I take pleasure in individuals.  I get my power from others.  Sure, it may be tiring and once I want it, I relaxation.  We’re near our daughters and their associates, that really is a blessing.  I really feel fortunate.  

You realize it’s humorous.  You will have youngsters.  You assume that when they’re 18 you’re executed elevating them.  When you get them out of highschool, you possibly can say I did it and I’m carried out.  Truly I feel there are lots of people on the market that do do this.  I feel there are quite a bit individuals on the market, which have youngsters for a paycheck.  Having youngsters and elevating them are two various things.  It’s exhausting to repeat your self, it’s exhausting to remind them continuously of belongings you don’t agree with.  It’s exhausting being a superb father or mother.  Anyway that’s one other matter.  However my mom would say to me, when you might have them you’ll all the time have a fear for the remainder of your life.  You already know I might blow her off as a result of I actually didn’t get it, I needed a household.  I significantly was so younger.  And belief me, that fear is actual.  I by no means need my daughters to unfastened contact of how shut they’re.  I fear of their well being, their careers, their relationships.  I fear of them being bullied, talked about, lied to.  I fear of them strolling to their automobiles.  A mom’s fear by no means ends it doesn’t matter what age.  Ugh  Final night time at dance, Crystal says to Katelynn and I, as we have been chatting well beyond dance class.  You already know what provides me stress, a variety of stress in addition to most cancers?  Worrying about my sisters.  I hate what goes on of their neighborhoods.  I discover myself driving by their houses to ensure they’re protected.  I sat in Courtney’s parking zone one night time.  I really feel like I’m all the time worrying about them, what they’re doing and the way they act.  And as I drove residence, I assumed I by no means knew she apprehensive that a lot about her sisters.  A sisters fear.  We raised them proper.  They’re shut to one another.  I assume that’s love.  And all of us need to be beloved.  All of us need to really feel love.  And love might be so exhausting.  Unconditional love is probably the most lovely factor and can be probably the most heartbreaking factor.  

I hope you could have an exquisite 4th of July.  Land of the Free, Residence the Courageous.  Thanks to all who’re and have served.

About the author